Found in the internet. As a recent traveller through YVR, I would argue with Jonathan Winters. Getting to the airport is relatively easy; getting through the airport to the aircraft is the hard part. Regardless, enjoy these online observations.

When the white missionaries came to Africa, they had the Bible and we had the land.  They said ‘Let us pray.’  We closed our eyes.  When we opened them, we had the Bible and they had the land.
~ Desmond Tutu

Men are like linoleum floors.  Lay ’em right the first time and you can walk all over them for thirty years.
~ Betsy Salkind

The only reason they say “Women and children first” is to test the strength of the lifeboats.
~ Jean Kerr

When a man opens a car door for his wife, it’s either a new car or a new wife.
~ Prince Philip

Kill one man and you’re a murderer.  Kill a million and you’re a conqueror.
~ Jean Rostand

We are here on earth to do good unto others.  What the others are here for, I have no idea.
~WH Auden

Having more money doesn’t make you happier.  I have 50 million dollars but I’m just as happy as when I had 48 million.
~ Arnold Schwarzenegger

If God had intended us to fly he would have made it easier to get to the airport.
~ Jonathan Winters